Breathing Deeply: My Life With Cystic Fibrosis

I like doing "girly" things. I especially like fulfilling a traditional role in the home as my husband's wife. I don't know exactly why that is, other than it gives me a lot of joy to know that I am meeting my husbands needs and loving him as he wants to be loved. He doesn't "expect" me to do things around the house, especially since I'm still not quite feeling perfect. The fact that doing little "woman's work" type things are not requirements around here makes me all the more willing to do them anyway. It's amazing the sense of reward and accomplishment I get from something as simple as ironing a few shirts or balling up some socks.

Yesterday was a great day. For the first time in months, Brad and I went to church together. Even though we had only visited that particular church a few times since we moved to the area, are overwhelmed by how quickly we were able to make some connections with people there. One young couple in particular made us feel so welcomed! While I was in the hospital they were a great source of encouragement to us.

At first we were hesitant about letting people in the new congregation know that I had CF. My usual policy is that I prefer people get to know "Lauren" and not "that gal with CF." God has worked a lot in my heart to help me overcome the adolescent fears about what people might think of me. My husband has been really great at keeping me from getting so uptight about such things. Although I'm sure that being an adult has a lot to do with how I incorporate CF into my social arena, I know that it's more than just maturity. It's about feeling safe and having a secure identity. My identity as a follower of God is strong, as is my identity as Brad's wife.

Life is good, even when my health isn't. Knowing that I have an incredibly supportive spouse, encouraging friends, and a God who provides for me-- each makes life worth living.

Today was another day filled to the brim with...nothing! The best part is, I didn't mind. I spent most of the morning just resting in bed, doing a lot of reading. Yesterday when my mom was here she jokingly asked what I was reading these days, so I told her; Milton's "Paradise Lost" and Moore's "Utopia". How's that for a little light reading? Just because I can't run a marathon doesn't mean I'm not exercising my brain.

Then of course there's the brainless sort of activity such as surfing the web. I don't like to be completely idle, so even when I'm sitting in front of the computer I'm attempting to use my creative juices. I've written a handful of articles now for Associated Content, and I'm practicing the fine art of writing to a topic thanks to Helium. Here are links to what I've written. Nothing too spectacular, but hey, it's better than posting all over myspace or something. (*shudder*)

Associated Content Articles
Helium: Where Knowledge Rules

The new year is shaping up quite well. I'm gaining strength each day and I'm feeling the urge to nap less frequently. My appetite is improving (though not yet back to ravenous), and I seem to have put on just enough weight to wear real clothes again instead of sweats and pajamas.
Being at home every day is a little weird, and I haven't quite settled into a routine. Most of my creative energy goes into writing or playing the piano. Having those two things as an outlet are really keeping me sane. The life of a homebody is something of a foreign concept, but I'm adjusting.

I have a feeling that even once I return to work in a couple months, I won't be doing much traveling. I'll miss that, but I know it's for the best. Maybe I'll still have a chance to do the semi-local stuff, like the project with the Army Corps of Engineers. But that's getting ahead of myself. Right now I need to continue resting because so far it's working.

Here's a fun little tidbit: so far I have not been hospitalized at all in 2007! Woohoo! (yes, that was lame, but humor me anyway...)