Thursday, August 14, 2008

Back to the Hospital

I've barely had the chance to get used to my own bed again and already I'm heading back to the hospital. My lung function test last night at my doctor appointment revealed that my breathing is just as shallow as it was when I was hospitalized the last time. What's weird though is that I don't feel as dragged out as last time. Could it be that I've just gotten so used to feeling lousy that I accept it as the norm?

I expected to have to wait for a bed like usual, but of course the only thing predictable about the hospital is that it's unpredictable. The administration just called and said they can admit me this afternoon. I've already got a bag packed with all the "essentials" (yarn, knitting needles, cute jammies, snacks) so as soon as Brad gets here we'll load up the car and head back up to La Jolla.

Emotionally/mentally, I don't really feel anything right now. I'm sort of flat. I'm disappointed of course that I have to go back, but I guess I've sort of come to terms with it. I suppose that's the best way to be when you don't really have a choice about something.

At least this time I'm going in with a better weight. I'm currently 114, which is quite an improvement from the 103 I was when I left the hospital last time. With the help of some banana bread from Grandma, I'm pretty sure I can keep the weight going in the right direction.

I'll try to update as I'm able.

What? Oh no.

Can I come tomorrow night?
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